And the Tacky Goes To …

In a stunning move from the back of the field, the 2011 Tackiest Product of the Year Award is won by Whitman’s Candies, Inc. for their tasteful selection of assorted fruits and nuts in the Jesus Selection. If the product does well, next year’s holiday line up will include Muslim Mints, Jew-sie Fruits and the large size Jesus Christ Super Bar.

NOTE: If any of you art types would like to design a Tacky Award, I will be happy to bestow it. And happier still to review your choices for Tackiest Product of 2012.

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Liquid Diet

We “sleevers” have to spend four weeks on a liquid diet. And no, Rob, that doesn’t mean pitchers of blended Margaritas. You need to get lots of liquid including lots of liquid protein.

I knew those grade school story problems would come in handy some day. As in: Little Billy had twelve hours to drink 70 grams of liquid protein. But he also needed to have 64 ounces of liquid. How much must Little Billy consume in each of twelve equal hours?

I have never purchased liquid protein products before. Now I find myself at the health food store at Rite Aid in Dog Patch along with all of the body builders from the Coast Guard or Axe Men wannabes. Everything has names like Infusion or Proti-Hi and comes in electrifying colors with graphics of fab abs.

The body builders look at me like I must be an alien life form. I look at them and know they are.

Posted in Weight loss | 2 Comments
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