Tasty tidbits
No doubt about it, cruise food is showing signs of a downturn in the economy. Remember the lobster of yesterday? Today it was all you can eat Squid Balls Soup. I imagine the chocolate on tomorrow night’s midnight buffet will be replaced with Peeps and Circus Peanuts.
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His mother told him he could have whatever he wanted from the buffet that evening. So the little boy’s dinner was mashed potatoes with gravy and brownies. Oh, to be young again.
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They had just brought out a new platter of papaya, and there was only one man ahead of me. What joyful luck. Ripe papaya is ambrosia, a true gift of the gods and you can never ever get it at, say, the Piggy Wiggly. I was absolutely delighted, and wanted to do the little supper dance that Charlie (my doxy) does when his bowl is in sight. But then this snaky prick ahead of me picked up a bowl AND a plate and systematically helped himself to every single ripe piece, leaving only the bitter little strips as rock hard as, well, rocks. I was heart broken, which quickly morphed into fury. I no longer cared about global warming or GM or killer bees. I wanted to scream at him, “Put that back you miserable little fucker,” or maybe leap upon him and crack his scrawny little bastard head with its substandard brain stem against the deck repeatedly until cruise security hauled me away. I didn’t, but you might want to take this as a warning in case we ever meet: don’t fuck with my food.
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In Hilo, we drove through a McDonald’s for our iced coffee (we’re no longer Starbuck’s material). There they featured the regional menu extension you see below. I don’t look for it to go world wide anytime soon.
Back on board, I was told today I couldn’t have an iced coffee in one of the shipboard lounges because they didn’t have the right kind of glass. To all my friends: If I have ever served you iced coffee in inappropriate glassware, forgive me. I have only my Midwest bumpkin upbringing to blame.
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Non food tidbit: No trip to the islands is complete without a trip to Hilo Hattie’s for some real fine duds. I’m sure Linda, JB and the boys will be tickled to know we’ve made this pilgrimage just a month before Christmas. Mahalo, dudes
