Cassie: I am a collie (more or less) so I will gladly let you know when your child is stuck in a well or where you have misplaced your sheep. If I escape the yard, I run like the wind looking for emergencies where I can lend a paw. I am sweet beyond all human understanding but easily confused, so my people have been known to call me Addle Pate. Or sometimes Sneaky Bitch because I go through wastebaskets when their backs are turned. Hehe. Oh, and I suck on the rug. I don’t know why. I am bigger than the rest of the pack put together. Sometimes, I have to growl and snap to set them straight. Mostly though, these days I sleep.

Charlie: I’m worried all of the time, about empty bowls or why my pillow has been moved or what all the ballyhoo over fetching is about. People tell short jokes about me dangling my feet off a curb. If a new person comes, I pee on the rug I get so worried. I know this is a bad dog bad dog shame on Charlie thing but I can’t help it. I can disappear under the bed faster than Alice down the rabbit hole. I worry they will find my bottle caps, socks, and dryer sheets under here. I like to be in the yard with Cassie because I am smarter and can get her to dig deep holes, the better to search for badgers. Oh God, what if we find one? What will I do? I’m so worried.

Bella: Hi I’m the one they call the Princess and I think it’s because I am so pretty don’t you and I love all my fans so come on over and I’ll give you endless kisses and allow you to take anything you like and we can play and play and play the whole day through running very, very fast and turning in circles and chewing on toys and ok I’m tired now good-bye.

Caesar: I’m a tough customer so don’t be thinking you’re welcome around here, not now, not ever, by golly. Ring the bell and I’ll carry on til I’m carried off to the garage. Sit down and I’ll leap in your lap. Stand up and I’ll pull on your cuff. Leave laundry about and I’ll chew holes. Put a newspaper on the steps and I’ll drag that sucker up the stairs to its rightful owner. My teeth are a mess, my eyes are beady, my fur is wild but I’m pretty cute nonetheless. But don’t be fooled: I’m the size and spirit of a killer bee. Oh, and, I am in love with the Princess and try to jump her all day long but all she wants to do is play. Bitch.