Ramblings 11
Educational note: Just in case you ever need to know this (like when you cut someone off on King Kamanamana Hwy and they speak to you in a distinctly un-island-like tone of voice), “U Fa” is Hawaiian for “You suck.” Or so I’ve been told.
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American Idol Gives Back Crap! We was robbed. American Idol played a dirty little trick on us. I tune in specifically to see someone booted back to Anonymity Ville. I’m as happy as the next person to see children saved, and I do my share. But AI stole my time and didn’t deliver the goods. They even made Jordin cry, for chrissake. All I have to say is AI, u fa!
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We had a garage sale last weekend. This activity wins the Most Work for the Least Money Award. But, hey, it’s all about the recycling, right? My favorite sale of the day: a ten-ish year old boy bought a paperweight in the shape of a giant aspirin. He said it was for his mom for Mother’s Day because he gave her so many headaches. She’s unlikely to want the two pound plaster aspirin, but I guarantee she will keep it forever.
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Confession Corner: It makes me happy to see people who are fatter than me. You dieters are making me nervous.
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The broken heart: The Mister’s favorite aide announced she is leaving the Fun House staff. He says she has the biggest heart of anyone there. So I found a key ring with a rhinestone-studded heart that he could give her. He tucked it in his pocket. The laundry washed his shirt. His heart was returned to him without the key holder and missing two rhinestones. Which is what can happen when you decide to give your heart away. Bottom line, the aide decided to stay after all. So there was no need to give her his heart. Once again, a man who doesn’t need to commit. And a woman who has no idea how he feels.
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Speaking of the Mister, as you know I am about to jump a southbound ship, leaving him to fare on his own. He’s the only person at the home that doesn’t think I’m a real shit. All he required is Paul Newman salad dressing, some gummi bears and a jar of peanuts. With his computer, TV and DVD player, he will stay amused. Ya gotta love this guy.
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I’ll post when I can for the next couple weeks. Adios.